out of the rat race. ..

damn.. juz can't put de thoughtz in mind into werdz.. tryin' not to involve anythin' personal into this but.. .thingz -currently- juz kept croppin' up in (my) Life. ..
can never say that "Life Sucks" though. .it'z we, ourself -an individual- who's livin' our own life. .. ur insultin' urself by sayin' that. .. suggestin' to all that u don't know how to live ur life proper. ..

reflection on self.:
i find no motivation in studyin' what i'm currently studyin'. .. that's the reason why i've been skippin' lecs. labs. & tutorials without much of a thought. not even carin' much of the possibility of me bein' debarred or even suspended. .. it's just not my thing. .. it's hard pursuin' somethin' that's not of ur interest. .. projects are a burden.. everythin' in relation to it will be a burden. .. but then.. i've got friends pushin' me on. tellin' me to keep goin' since i'm already here. .. it's only the 1st year. gonna have to choose 1 of 3 courses we'll want to pursue for the 2nd year. .. yet again.. none of the 3 is of interest to me. .. though maybe (& maybe only) 1 of it appeals to me.. hopefully i'll get thru' all this -no matter how long it takes. .. all these paper-chase.. makes me sick -in the mind-. gosh..


how.i.wished. ..